Sunday, November 17, 2013

Now Mike Bara is a "professional UFO investigator"

So much the better -- the more he pontificates about UFOs the less time he'll have to fuck up astronomy and the history of spaceflight. I wonder what kind of exams you have to pass to get credentialed as a real pro?

        What am I talking about? Mike's new TV show, Uncovering Aliens. Derrel Sims, Maureen Elsberry, Steve Jones and MB will be doing their level best to breathe some new life into this very tired topic as they trudge around hotspots like Sedona and Rendlesham Forest. I can practically write the script in  my head. Every sequence will end with a question like "COULD THIS HAVE BEEN the work of ALIENS?" Conjecture will substitute for fact, and nothing resembling science will ever raise its head.

        The show is scheduled on Animal Planet in December, at air times well past peak hours, and it'll probably repeat as endlessly as Ancient Aliens. Good luck in your new profession, Mike!! You were a total nincompoop at writing about astronomy — UFOlogy is a field in which incompetence doesn't even get noticed. I think you may have found your niche.

33 comments:

Garry Swanwick said...

I've yet to figure out (and I haven't given it *that* much brainspace how one can professionally Investigate something that doesn't exist :), oh, wait, it's his latest attempt to con the gullible and thoughtless out of their hard-earned, I'm *sure* there'll be a book out to accompany the series :o/

Chris Lopes said...

UFO's are definitely more Mike's style. Too bad the hey day for such things was a few decades ago. Now the subject is just an also ran with all the other woo. There's a reason Hoagie tried not to get involved (until he ran out of other material) with this nonsense. The audience is small and the competition for that audience is stiff.

Esteban Navarro said...

They look like a pathetic version of"Wild Bunch" (Sam Pekimpah) in that picture...Ecks!...

Dee said...

When I see that photo, I was thinking that they really should add John McAfee to this crack team of investigators. He could bring much needed IT and weapon expertise to the investigation. And some more credibility! ;-)

Robert Ghostwolf's Ghost said...

"They look like a pathetic version of 'Wild Bunch' (Sam Pekimpah) in that picture...Ecks!..."

I'm thinking they look more like Dog the Bounty Hunter's latest posse. Either way, their scowling visages and bad to the bone leather coats are going to tell the ETs in no uncertain terms that those characters mean business.

Strahlungs Amt said...

...6 million Americans believe they've had an actual physical encounter with an extra-terrestrial. What lies behind this increasing number of reports?...

Let me guess: Crystal Meth? Moonshine? Whippets? Ritalin?

The possibilities are endless. Don't worry, Investigator Bara will get to the bottom of it.

Strahlungs Amt said...

If it wasn't for that one female, I would have said it was the Village People's 35th anniversary reunion.

expat said...

They certainly could do a great...

\o/ ^o^ (o_ /o\

Chew said...

Maureen Elsbury is rather skeptical about a lot of UFO claims. On her YouTube show she and her co-host review recent UFO sightings and usually dismiss them with prosaic explanations (bugs, aircraft, etc). It will be interesting to she if she keeps that skepticism on this new show.

Anonymous said...

"This is no ordinary group of investigators. They bring a broad range of skills and experience to the subject to maximise their chance of success. From aeronautics engineering"

The aeronautics engineering would be Turkish Mike then? I see... And presumably he can present his MEng, and other certs to qualify that title?

Only two have sunglasses on in the photo, no way cool enough..

SB

Chris Lopes said...

@Anonymous
Yeah, I caught the aeronautics engineering thing too. Apparently being a CAD/CAM operator for an aerospace company makes you an engineer in the same way that the nice lady who took your blood sample in the hospital is a neurosurgeon.

Mulvaney said...

I am sure he will still find plenty of time to make mistakes about astronomy and space flight, so no worries there. But it would probably help Bara's research into the subject if he got abducted and that could distract him.

Dee said...

Mulvaney: "...if he got abducted and that could distract him."

Any dis-tracting probe would do...

Anonymous said...

@Chris Lopes;
I know a few 'proper' engineers (Electrical, mechanical and at least one with a PhD who works for Boeing in the Uk-he had a part in the 787 apparently); but their main gripe is when anyone who fixes a washing machine or photocopier is called an 'engineer'. But as you say, blood samples and neurosurgeon is a very good analogy. I hope Mike will be correcting the website 'engineer'..I mean dreamweaver clicker and insist the term be modified to more modest achievments.

SB

Esteban Navarro said...

Yeah, Gosht, Ja ja ja...I,m sure Bara´s a fan of Chuck Norris, too ;) http://bloximages.chicago2.vip.townnews.com/missoulian.com/content/tncms/assets/v3/editorial/b/8f/b8fad5c6-e194-11e2-8e98-001a4bcf887a/51d0466f3ee62.preview-620.jpg

Strahlungs Amt said...

Sure, Dreamweaver clicker. Mike is too cool for Adobe products. He's a Microsoft Man. In one of his master-debating moments he had with Expat about image manipulation Photoshop was mentioned. Mikey revealed that he used Windows Paint and Expat was a "Blithering Idiot".

Case closed!

Trained Observer said...

You have to look at it this way, the show will supply this blog with more wonderful material. It's a win-win. I've been fascinated with the whole subject of UFOs since I saw The Day the Earth Stood Still as a little kid. After ump-teen years of keeping up with it, the truth of the matter is all there is to "study" is the subculture created by "UFO reports." I'm sure Mike's new show will provide a good opportunity for that, and a howl a minute at the very least.

expat said...

Don't count on this blog being too interested. I definitely won't watch it on AnPlan but if/when it turns up on youchoob I might have a look. UFOlogy just never seems to get anywhere.

Chris Lopes said...

I'm with Trained Observer on this one. While the subject of UFO's itself has limited (to say the least) interest, I've always been fascinated by the subculture that developed from it. Many of the same type of people who read Mike's crap are drawn to the subject as well. So some coverage how Bara interacts with them might be interesting.

Robert Ghostwolf's Ghost said...

Expat, you might find his latest blog entry interesting. He's hinting darkly that JFK may have been assassinated because he was going to give away NASA secrets, including those pertaining to the discovery of extra-terrestrial activity, to the Soviets. I can't recall all the details now, but he manages to find some sort of Masonic connection. That's Part 1. The exciting conclusion will be published soon.

expat said...

Mike's bloggery today is a total rehash. I covered it in April 2011:

As for that stupid Brookings report, I've pointed out about 1,000 times that IT DOES NOT SAY WHAT HOAGLAND & BARA SAY IT SAYS.

Robert Ghostwolf's Ghost said...

Expat, a thousand pardons for inadvertently giving the impression I was defending him. I can see how you got that impression, but it was an epic sarcasm fail, which is quite embarrassing because I'm usually pretty good at sarcasm. Just ask any of my friends and relatives...

Again, I apologize for the misunderstanding, and I'll try not to let it happen again. I'm fairly new to your blog, and enjoy it immensely, so please don't take anything I post the wrong way. All the best!

expat said...

Ghost: No, I didn't think you were defending Mike. I'd already read his blog.

Jolene Rae Harrington said...

Appreciate your insight into TV programming, but take it from one who has been working as media consultant in UFO field for over 15 years: It is an uphill battle. Don't blame the researchers who DO NOT control the presentation or the scripting. In fact they PUSH BACK a lot, often at their own peril. I consulted on this particular program, and can say that the production company was very open to learning the facts about the subject matter, and always receptive to ideas. All is overseen by the networks, and their focus is entertainment. So not to say you are incorrect in your prediction--just don't blame Derrel, Maureen and Mike (well, blaming him seems to be your raison d'etre, so carry on if you like--it's your blog).

As for the Alien Hunter, you cannot imagine how hard we have worked over the years to craft a credible vision of the UFO research that will be broadcast to a mainstream audience, which means we needs must work with networks who control the media. Derrel and his team want to get a wider audience of scientists, academics and regular folks involved in the research. It is HARD WORK done at great personal and professional sacrifice. Media is the means, not the message.

Repeat: Media is the means, not the message. It's a starting point. It's a CONTROLLED starting point. And the cast does not have the control. So while like you I often sit back in my living room and scoff and laugh and get outraged at what I see portrayed on the small screen, often downright fabrications, I have a broader understanding of the battle we wage, and have dedicated hours, days, months, years to influence the way this subject matter is portrayed. Usually it's a futile and often thankless effort. But sometimes we get lucky--and it's for those individuals that we reach and help, and for those few courageous souls that respond with offers of professional assistance, that we soldier on.

Okay rant over, just asking for a little compassion.

expat said...

Thanks very much, Jolene, I appreciate your comment. I'm no stranger to TV production myself, having in my time produced/written/directed five major documentaries on spaceflight. In my work, the guys in front of camera did have creative input -- and one of them was Carl Sagan by the way (I don't normally drop Carl's name, and at least I don't refer to him as "my great friend" as Hoagland does all too often and with much less justification.)

You've made me understand your situation very well. I'll watch the shows and realize that calling these people "professional UFO investigators" is a LOL. Maybe even a ROFL.

expat said...

Well, the show didn't exactly fit my pattern but it was rubbish anyway. An hour of "uncovering aliens" in which not one alien actually appeared, or even any convincing evidence of one.

It was kind-of like "The Mythbusters go UFO hunting" but without the production values.

I'm not going to review it for the blog, there's no science to review.

Robert Ghostwolf's Ghost said...

I didn't catch the show, but your brief summary is all the review necessary to know that it met all expectations by coming up empty.

However, I did see the official promo picture for the show posted on Mike's site, and that is just begging to be reviewed. For starters, it looks like an ad for a show about a bail bond business or a band of no-nonsense, self-styled neighborhood Crime Stoppers rather than one about a group of highly trained, no-nonsense, scientific investigators. And in conclusion, is that really the best picture they had? Poor little Mike is barely visible behind the big cowboy, and probably had to stand on tiptoe just to peek over his shoulder. Couldn't they find a box for him to stand on?

expat said...

There's a better version but I'll be damned if I'll link to it.

I'm sure the mythbusters is what they wanted to invoke. I'll make one more comment, too, of a more technical nature. I visualize the director telling his Director of Photography "This is Mythbusters meets The Blair Witch project, OK?" So the DP threw away his tripod and fired his focus-puller. That's what the video looked like. Amateur.

Robert Ghostwolf's Ghost said...

Somebody should submit that picture to the Awkward Family Photos site. It would be right at home there.

expat said...

The show's now on Youchoob

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CNB3Ld7eVpA&feature=youtu.be

Anonymous said...

Expat is a giant bag of shit

mirza tawseef said...

Being an aeronautical Engg student..think that is possible.....!!

Anonymous said...

When it comes to ufo's, there's no room for objectivity, amirite?